Goodbyes hurt like hell.

My story starts when I reached my higher elementary levels, my parents were forced to go abroad, due to my parents’ salary aren’t enough to sustain us. It was the hardest part of my life letting my parents go, the worst of all is the parental love you can get are all lost. I and my sister were placed under the care of our grandma, though she is the mom of my dad, I still can’t feel the love I so dearly desire. Did you ever have the feeling of hunger for the cooking of your mom? Well, I know how that feels, for the past months since my parents leave, it is kind of different eating food cooked by others, worst is all I have in my mind is how they are now, are they having fun now? Are they crying? How I miss them, at first I thought I was going to loose my mind, the feeling was like being stock in box where no one knew where you are. Then, all of a sudden my cousin brought a surprise, a computer we can use to have a chat with my parents, I was relieved. To be able to see them was enough for me. When I was to graduate, my parents came home to be there for my graduation, after 11 months of them gone. But nothing last forever, they still have to leave back to Japan. When I turned to my High school, we moved to my aunt’s place because my grandma decided to leave us to return to her house. Eventually, I got in touch with my aunt’s place, I had friends and lots of fun, but still the feeling is very heavy. My birthday, first birthday of all not having my parents, it was different and a little odd, cause I was used to being awaken by my parents with a birthday cake already to be blown, it was a little sad but still it is my birthday, I just can’t stop having fun. Summertime, my first year was just finished, a surprise came along, my sister and I was to go to Japan, to be with my parents once more, at least for 2 months. When I was off to the airport, when I saw my parents, tears of joy were shed from my eyes. Cold, a normal temperature in Japan was below 20 degrees, but this cold means nothing to the warmth I am feeling right now, the first hug given by my mom and dad after a year. I spent my 2 months of vacation going to Tokyo and Disneyland and spent it with my parents in Japan, so glad to be with them, but all happiness has to end at some point. The come back, tears and sadness all mashed up in that airport, when the plane landed on Philippines, my body felt heavy like I want to return to that plane, and ride back to Japan, but my life has still to go on. Second year, a blast, I believe to be my best High school life ever. Studies became hard at those times my parents were gone, one is I can’t focus on my studies. Summertime once more, my second year has just ended with a blast, new friends and something new I just learned. Time to come back once more, but before that, a crisis hit, my granddad got sick because of that my dad came back, to say his last goodbyes to his dad, though my granddad didn’t make it, everyone was so sad after my granddad departure to heaven, it was also my sister, my dad and me to depart back to Japan. As was our last visit there it was great, we traveled to Tokyo and visited a Water park zoo, in the end all happiness, I was already getting used to this kind of goodbyes, all the pain I kept from those goodbyes makes my everyday life feeling heavy, though I have learned how to hide the pain through this fake smiles, all I can think off, is how painful goodbyes are. Now, I’m on my Third year level and it was as hard as it was before and as painful as before, we visited my parents in Japan this Christmas, and it was fun, though as painful as goodbyes are we still has to say them once more. All I wish for is for a year with my family back together, because all this painful goodbyes are getting harder and harder to swallow. Goodbyes, I have learned its true meaning, it has a painful meaning, but sometimes, goodbyes are all you have left, for me I simply think its see you later, rather than goodbyes.